Chaos
by frances janvier
Summary: Teddy's sick, and there's a murderous flamingo on the loose.


**Teddy is about eight years old in this story.**

 **Written for Round Two of the Mystery Competition:** Bewildering Poke, you will be writing Teddy Lupin as your main character in a story with your genres as hurt/comfort or humour or both.

 **Cinema Competition II:** Back to the Future - "You're late. Do you have no concept of time?"

 **Challenges by the Dozen:** Write five post-canon stories.

* * *

"Harry, I'm in the middle of something important right now. Could you call back later?"

"But Hermione, something's up with Teddy. He can't speak properly or something, and he has a really high fever. I honestly have no idea what's going on. Ginny's out at yet another Weasley family reunion. The doctor is on holiday. You're the only one left who could possibly help. Could you _please_ come over to my house for an hour or so, Hermione?"

From where he was trapped in his bed, Teddy Lupin heard his godfather let out a relieved sigh a minute after and then hang up the phone.

"I'm not feeling any better, Harry," said Teddy, frowning. "I'm feeling queasy now, too."

Or at least, that's what he _tried_ to say. Instead, it came out as, "Yrrah, retteb yna gnileef ton m'i. Oot, won yseauq gnileef m'i."

Judging from Harry's expression, he couldn't understand one word of what Teddy had just said. "Err... Everything will be okay, Teddy, Hermione will be here soon to help out."

" _Erus_ uoy era?"

"... Sure. Let's go with that."

* * *

It was now a few hours later, and both of them were starting to worry.

"Enoimreh s'erehw, Yrrah?" Teddy began to say, but suddenly, he got a very sharp headache.

"WO!" he exclaimed in agony, his head slamming back down against the pillow. "... Gnimoc era sgniht dab yrev... Ognimalf a ees i... Orgnimalf a..."

With that, he promptly passed out just as the doorbell started buzzing extra loudly.

* * *

The next thing he knew, Teddy was being carried bridal style down the hallway of Harry's house by a person he remembered was Hermione.

"Ereh er'uoy, Enoimreh! Osla driew gnihtemos ro detniaf tsuj I kniht I dna Yrrah ot gnidrocca esnes yna gnikam si yas i gnihton yltnerappa dna revef driew a evah i dna kcis m'i-"

"We've got literally zero time to catch up right now; sorry Teddy. A giant murderous pink Australian flamingo is chasing after us so I need you to cut the blatherskite, please!"

So that's what had been in his vision from before. He didn't quite understand all of what Hermione had said, but he assumed it was something along the lines of "Faster!"

Teddy started to twist his head around backwards to see how close the flamingo was, but Hermione shouted out to intervene. "Don't look back, Teddy! We've got to run!" And so they did keep running, with Teddy still in her arms.

They reached the stairs and it felt like they were flying as Hermione soared upwards, fueled by adrenaline. "Harry is behind us, fighting off the flamingo, if you were wondering. But for now we just need to keep running, I think."

Finally, the two of them reached another hallway, and turned right into a bathroom with a small window on one of the walls. Hermione quickly locked the door behind them, and she put him down for a moment, panting.

Of course, he happened to collapse straight away yet again. "Lufwa yllaer yllaer leef llits I, Enoimreh..." he started to say, but then vomited a rainbow all over the floor.

Hermione fished a small, colorful pill from her pocket. "Eat this. It won't take away all of the symptoms, but it'll make you feel better until we can get out of here. I can't get you out of the window until Harry gets here."

They waited for about three more minutes, and the grunts and yells of spells showed no sign of stopping soon.

Finally, Harry burst through the bathroom door, a battered and yet still running flamingo on his heels.

"Harry, you're late. Have you no sense of time?"

"No time to chat! Get the window with me!"

Together, the two of them heaved open the window. "Get ready, Teddy!"

And suddenly, Teddy was scooped up and thrown straight out the window, with his godfather and aunt trailing behind.

There was a thumb behind them on the grass after a charmed soft landing.

"Here, Teddy, take some of this. I've heard flamingo feathers are quite medicinal."


End file.
